


Virago

by carpesidera



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fix It, Hermione Granger is a Badass, Hermione granger needs a nap and a large glass of wine, How Do I Tag, So much angst, Time Travel, Time Turner, dumbeldore is a dick, everyone dies, then everyone lives
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-12
Updated: 2020-01-11
Packaged: 2020-05-01 22:11:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 5
Words: 13,081
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19186372
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/carpesidera/pseuds/carpesidera
Summary: The war was lost when Harry Potter fell.Now after over a year of torture at the hands of Death Eaters Hermione Granger has a chance to save the world.By rewriting the last 18 years.





	1. Chapter 1

Four hundred and sixteen days.

Four hundred and sixteen days of being stuck in the Malfoy dungeons. Hermione wanted to scream, but her voice had left her seventy days ago. It had given up after one particularly bad torture session and she didn’t miss it.

The sad, pathetic sound of her own screams were grating. She was better than this.

She had been better than this.

Once upon a different time, when the war just a future thought, she had loved the sound of her own voice. Loved how she sounded when she laughed with her friends, loved how she would raise her voice to answer a question or yell at her boys.

But everyone was gone now. 

Harry.

Ron.

Neville.

Remus.

They were all gone, dead at the hands of Deatheaters. All dying for her, bodies thrown in front of her own to get her here.

How they would weep to see her now.

She stared at the wall opposite her. Her nails had scratched tally’s of the passing days, or what she thought were days. She had not seen the sun in just as many days.

Does the sun even shine in a Voldemort run world? Does it still glisten off the morning dew, do people raise their faces to enjoy the warmth in brought.

Or was the world plunged into darkness like it always did when the bad guy won in old muggle movies?

_ I hope the world is in darkness _ she horribly thought as she tossed a tiny bit of rubble at the wall. 

This was not how the world was meant to be, this was not the future she had envisioned.

Harry was meant to win. He had almost won. But the battle of Hogwarts had taken a horrible turn after Harry had leapt from Hagrid's arms.

He had dueled Voldemort, their wands connected as they both aimed to kill. Everyone had all stopped their own fighting, Deatheaters and the Order all standing still as they held in their breathe. 

Hermione remembered how Voldemort had smiled as he pushed his magic onto Harry. How the grin had taken over his face for just a second she could almost understand why people followed the horrible man. But then his wand moved, the connection lost as he turned his wand to her.

“Do you love the little Mudblood?” he had sung before a green light had erupted around them. She had froze, waiting for the magic to take her onto the next adventure. To finally have a rest. But nothing came except a scream. Ginny screamed and sobbed next to her as Hermione took in what laid at her feet.

Who laid at her feet.

Harry stared up at her, his green eyes fixated on nothing as his body cooled almost instantly. He was gone.

The battle was lost from that moment. Ginny died clinging to Harry’s lifeless body, her sobs seemed to echo long after she had fallen silent, her body laying protectively over Harry's.

Hermione ran, she had never felt bad about running. She had grabbed Ron's hand and called for a retreat. 

The Order were in so much shock they were sitting ducks, so many innocent lives fell as they ran back towards the Castle. Hermione not once letting go of Ron's hand. Curses fell from her lips as she haphazardly threw spells behind her. 

How many deatheaters that fell from her wand, she would never know. But as each day passed she wished the number was high.

The weeks passed quickly as the remaining Order ran and hid. They managed to hold Hogwarts for three weeks before the great doors couldn’t hold up against the dark magic. Hermione had stood in the entrance way her wand out and her feet planted firmly on the ground. She had kissed Ron goodbye and sent him running further into the castle.

“You’re mum won’t forgive you if you die.” she whispered before pushing him away, tears falling from each of them as they held their hands together for just a moment longer.

“I love you.” he whispered to her and she shook her head, her long curls falling free from their band.

“We could have had a great life.” she pulled him in for one more kiss, clinging to him for just a moment longer before pushing him off her and turning her back.

“For Harry.” She said to the remaining Order members, all older than her but all whom looked to the young Witch as their unofficial leader.

“FOR HARRY!” they called and then the doors slammed open. 

For the second time in her life the green light of death surrounded her.

And for the second time the green light could not touch it. 

Ron's body fell into her arms, his warm to touch she couldn’t comprehend what was in front of her and she wanted to scream, so take a moment to hold him tight, but strong arms pulled her from him and Ron Weasleys body fell to the floor with a silent thud. 

Remus pulled her away, protecting her as she stumbled over even more bodies of fallen friends. 

Her mind was clouded for days after Ron's death, she couldn’t remember how they got out of Hogwarts but after a few days she pulled herself together and awoke to find themselves in the Welsh countryside.

Remus and Neville were the only two with her that she knew, but in makeshift tents and lean to's there was about fifteen witches and wizards all looking just how Hermione felt. 

Neville was with her the whole time, his fingers entwined with hers as they both tried to find comfort in the other. But as the welsh weather turned from damp to terensial in just a matter of days and the camp was forced to move on.

They couldn’t go back to London, the owls they had received before the weather turned told them that it had fallen, the Dark mark now hung over the Tower of London and the Muggles were being rounded up in the hundreds. 

Hermione had silently sobbed at the thought of all those poor Muggles but she allowed herself a moment of selfishness to be pleased that her own Parents would not be amongst the fallen.

Hermione listened at the adults make decisions to go and hid further into the countryside, or flee to the continent. And she had never felt so much rage as she had in that moment.

“This is still our world! You can’t just run and hide.” She had whispered around the campfire one evening once the rain had given them a small reprieve. 

“Listen girlie, you can go fight if you want but it's a suicide mission.” The man to her left spoke, Hermione couldn’t place his name but it didn’t matter, all that mattered was all the nodding heads that echoed his.

“So? Is your life more important than anyone else's? Are you more important than the people being tortured on the streets?” She stood up, Neville grabbing her hand for either support or to stop her, either of them could tell which.

“Did you know Harry Potter died for you? He died for all of you! He laid his life on the line year after year from his first birthday for all of you and you are just going to sit here and what? Wait for it the blow over? You-Know-Who is here and he has control! So we can hide here and let the world go to hell or we can fight?” 

She had kept her tone calm, and her own tears at bay as she settled back onto the seat besides Neville. She searched for Remus on the other side of the fire, he nodded his approval, his brow furrowed as he stood.

“Hermione and I will go to London. Two people won’t be as hard to catch than all of us. If you want to help us, go to villages and recruit. The Order of the Phoenix is now open to anyone.”

“I’m coming to.” Neville said, sounded stronger than he ever had. Hermione had accepted his help with open arms.

But now she wished she had told him to stay for three days later Neville Longbottom would be dead.

He had stood in front of Hermione as a werewolf bared down on them near Leicester Square. They had been hiding in an old shop front and Greyback found them in less than two days. He had scratched open Hermione's face, leaving three long gashes over her right side before Neville stood between the two and gave Hermione and Remus time to run away. His screams would haunt her forever. If she made it that far.

The scars never truly healed, it had been two weeks from the full moon so she would not turn, but the scars were still magical in nature so no spell would remove them. Remus had treated them to the best of his ability but she had wept that night for the loss of her friend and for her scarred face. It had seemed to be such a childish thing to weep for but she couldn’t bring herself to look in a mirror. She didn’t think she would recognise herself.

She and Remus stayed in London, spending their time rescuing any muggle they could find, Apparating them out of the city and into safe pockets of Wales and Scotland where the Order was slowly rebuilding. Neither Hermione or Remus stayed with the Order for long. Remus had refused to even go back to Scotland where his Mother-in-law waited after the news Tonk didn’t survive the Battle of Hogwarts. He couldn’t bring himself to look his son in the eye after he had failed.

They both confessed their fears of failure after they had found a long forgotten bottle of vodka in an apartment they had stayed one night in. The Deatheaters had been through days before so it was as safe as possible.

Rems confessed his failures as a friend, as a husband and as a father. The heavy weight that sat on his shoulders mirrored Hermiones, as she spilled the secret of wiping her parents memory, of failing Harry and failing Ron by not being able to love him so much sooner. Of not having any time to be a teenager.

They had fallen asleep that night holding each other, as Remus sobbed quietly.

It was two months later when their run luck out, Hermione had been on look out as Remus checked on old cellar that was rumoured to be housing Muggle Born kids and their parents. 

Remus was halfway down the stairs when the first curse hit him.

“HERMIONE!” he screamed before trying to run back up the stairs as she reached for him.

She looked over his shoulder to see a swarm of Deatheaters in the cellar. Their masks were long gone now, there was no need to hide your face when you control the power. She knew some of them, Crabbe and Goyle stood out amongst the older faces.

Remus pulled Hermione behind him and for the third time someone who loved her died protecting her. 

Hermione stood alone on the stairs, her wand outstretched as she fruitlessly trying to fight them off. Curses hit her but she remained standing, her left side numb from a stunner but she kept her ground. 

“We want her alive.” came a boring drawl from above. She turned slowly and took in the back lit figure of Draco Malfoy.

“But-” Crabbe tried to interject but Malfoy sent a lazy silencing curse his way and the goon learnt his place.

He walked down and grabbed her and pulled her close.

“I’ll get us out of this.” he hissed into her ear before pulling her hair back and stared at the scars. Hermione stayed silent, her mind buzzing from his confession and from the pain of her hair being pulled.

“God you’re ugly.” he muttered before shouting ordered for her to be brought to Malfoy Manor.

“Untouched.” he warned before apparating on the spot.

That had been Four hundred and sixteen days ago.

Malfoy had kept his promise, other than a torture session every other day she was still alive. No deatheaters snuck in to find her in the dark of night and only Malfoy visited her.

But he came for nothing but silent companionship. 

He was stuck there as much as she was and from the screams she heard at night, he was being tortured just like her.

She leant back against the wall and closed her eyes, tears were a thing of the past for her but she still felt the undeniable pain of loss as she tried to recall the last time she had been even remotely happy.

“Get up.” Draco seemed to magically appear before her. As a Malfoy he would apparate inside the manor so it shouldn’t have been a surprise but Hermione still jumped. She glared him down but he just smiled back.

“You’re getting out today.” the stupid git was still smiling as he pulled a small necklace from his pocket. She was drawn to the gold piece as it swung from side to side in front of her. Her scarred hands, caked with old blood and grim she couldn’t even register they were her own. 

But as she brought it closer for inspection it dawned on her.

It was a time turner.

She looked from it back to the Slytherin who was still smiling like a lunatic.

She cocked her head to the side and parted her lips to argue but the sound was barely anything as her throat was torn from screams and misuse.

“A time turner?” 

“Yes, its You-Know-who's back up plan. It can go back 19 years.”

She stared him down and waved her hand for him to continue.

“Contingency Granger! If he failed at Hogwarts he would go back 19 years and try and kill Potter as a baby again! Now I have it, so you can go back and kill him then.”

Hermione couldn’t believe what she was hearing at all. If couldn’t be happening, magic like that couldn’t work. 

“Dark magic?” she croaked out, fear filling her stomach.

“Yes.” at least Malfoy had the good idea of looking uncomfortable about the fact. “But you are still going to use it. I can break the wards for a minute, apparate to Hogsmead and then turn it.” he pulled from his robes her wand.

Hermione was beyond tears but the weight of it in her hand as she snatched it up almost brought them on.

“I can’t.” she shook her head, “I fail everyone-you go?”

Draco shook his head and pushed the time turner into her hand.

“Granger, can I be selfish? I want to grow up in a world where I’m not a death eater, where the only thing I care about is quidditch and boys.” He pulled another thing from his pocket.

Her pink bag.

“This is amazing magic, you really were the brightest in our class. I added a few things for you, a list of all his followers from the first war.”

“Your father?”

“Is on the list- I would rather be without a father then grow up with him. Just-” his voice broke and he looked away tears falling freely, “just don’t let me be a twat. Make sure I know whose side to be on.” 

Hermiones heart broke again and she pulled him into a hug, her arms weak from disuse but she still held him close. 

“Okay.” she whispered into his ear.

He smiled broadly and pulled her to her feet, she swayed a little but with the comforting arm of Draco, once her enemy and now maybe her only friend, she stayed on her feet. 

“You will have two months.” he flicked his own wand and she felt the magic of the wards that surround Malfoy manor break around her.

“Go!” 

She took one last look at the man before her, so much like his father yet so different. His blonde hair hung to his collar, tied back with leather he could have been his father's spitting image, but it was the determined look on his face that showed him as his own man.

“You would have made a wonderful gryffindor.” she smiled before turning on the spot.

\----------------

The use of magic after so many months made her fall to the ground as she landed uncomfortable in the centre of Hogsmeade. 

The once quaint town was in ruins, the Three Broomsticks and Honeyduke were just smouldering rubble now. She blinked away the spots that formed as the sunshine shone down on her face.

_ So the sun does shine on a Voldemort run world. _

Hermione didn’t even bother climbing to her feet as she pulled the time turner around her neck. Nineteen turns and she will be back in time.

Her fingers hesitated for a moment, was she doing the right thing? 

Changing time was a lifetime sentence in Azkaban if she was ever caught.

But her own word came back to haunt her.

_ So? Is your life more important than anyone else's? Are you more important than the people being tortured on the streets? _

“For Harry.” she whispered before twisting the dials.

_ One. _

_ Two. _

_ Three. _

_ Four. _

_ … _


	2. Chapter Two

She landed with a thud.

The ground around her was softer than what she had left and as she allowed her head to fall back she felt the soft grass underneath and smiled.

For just one second she closed her eyes, she could hear the people around her. Heard their mutterings on her sudden arrival but for just one moment she enjoyed the feel of grass under her. She took stock of her body, everything felt right, nothing splitched or broken from the travel.

As she cracked open her eyes, the blinding sun was just as bad now as it had been before and she tried to blink away the migraine and spots that danced before her. But they stayed, and she knew in the back of her mind they would be there till she sought medical attention.

Pulling herself to her feet she observed the tiny village. It looked much like it had during her childhood, people rushed along the wide streets, Owls swooping above heads and children playing out the front of honeydukes. Her heart ached as memories of Harry and Ron threatened to overcome her.

_ Not now! _ She told herself, brushing off dirt from her back and straightening her shirt. Not that it would do much, the once pink shirt had been on her since she was captured and it had long turned an off shade of brown.

The Three Broomsticks was doing a steady trade with Madame Rosmerta out the front talking to patrons who were taking advantage of the sunny day, broom in hand, staring right at Hermione.

_ Here we go _ , she steeled herself and stumbled forward. She hadn’t walked on her own in months, Deatheaters dragged her to and from her cell and there was only so many laps on the 4 by 4 concrete prison she could do before madness took hold so each step towards the young bartender was excruciating. 

Madam Rosmerta started to rush to her side, broom thrown to the wayside as Hermione stumbled into her arms. She could hear Rosmerta call of help, could hear the urgency but the words couldn’t be arranged in her head.

“I need to see Dumbeldore.” she whispered, cursing her own voice for still being weak.

The barmaid looked shocked as Hermione started to sway. The pressure in her head was too much as more people swarmed her. Hands coming from nowhere as they tried to help hold her up. Every touch felt like a knife slicing her skin.

“Please-” Hermione muttered before the dark spots in her vision became too much. She clung to Rosmerta, her hands, scared beyond recognition looked out of place against the simple blue cotton.

“Oh.” and she was gone, falling into the darkness and finally feeling peace against the powerful ache of her head. Her last thought was of leaving herself open as more hands grabbed at her.

\-----------------------------------

The next time Hermione opened her eyes it was violent, she lurched from the bed she found herself on. Scrambling off the edge and landing hard on the floor she screamed a curse.

The swears fell from her lips in such rapid succession she finally understood why Ron liked to do it so much.

She stared wide eyed at her surroundings, she was in Hogwarts.

Relief rushed over her and she slumped against the hospital bed, letting the cool stone floor calm her rapid heart rate. She tried not to picture the Hogwarts she had left. The hospital wing had been one of the first wings to burn. Voldemort might have been an evil bastard but he was smart.

They couldn’t heal their wounded if they had no supplies. 

“Hello.” a voice dragged her from painful memories and brought her to her feet. She turned quickly and pulled her hands up in a fighting stance.

In the back of her head she could almost picture Ron laughing at her.

_ You going to fight someone in your nightie? Gee Hermione!  _

She shook him out and looked at who had spoken.

She meet periwinkle blue eyes and almost lost her footing as it dawns on her why it sounded so familiar.

Albus Dumbledore.

“Hello.” she said back, looking around the room for her wand. It sat on the bedside table, an arm's reach away.

Dumbeldore smiled at her and motioned for her to grab it.

“If it will make you feel safer.” he said in the same calm voice he had always spoken in.

It was grating to hear as Hermione grabbed the wand and pulled in between the two. 

Albus Dumbledore might have the age and experience to beat her in a duel but she had something he didn’t have.

An unlimited well of anger.

“Is this necessary? Rosmerta brought you here at your request.” He motioned for her to sit and against her better judgement she followed his wish and gentlet sat back on the bed, wand still raised.

“What happened to your sister?”

He arched an eyebrow and settled in the small visitors chair beside her bed.

“Why?”

“Anyone can wear anyone's face, but only you know what happened to Ariana.”

“She died.”

“Obviously.” even Hermione couldn’t believe how crasce she was being to the older wizard but she still couldn’t bring herself to lower her wand. Her arm ached and her nerves were screaming for release but she had not survived this long by being complacent.

“She was killed.”

“By?”

“Me.”

The admission was enough for Hermione to finally lower her wand. She kept it in her hand, like a child with a safety blanket it was a comforting weight.

“I am to assume your story is a long one.”

“I can keep it short if you prefer.” Hermione didn’t match his smile, couldn’t bring herself to even look him directly in the eye.

Once upon a time she had stood in a room, not far from this one, with Harry as the boy-who-lived raged against everything he had been made to do. His words pounded over her every thought as she sat in uncomfortable silence with the Headmaster.

_ He raised me to die Hermione! _

_ He didn’t tell me anything! _

_ I don’t want to die, not for him.  _

His words played like a broken record as she tried to think of how to explain her predicament.

So typical of Malfoy to spring this on her with no time to explain how this would work.

“Can I have your name?”

“Of course, Sorry. I’m Hermione-”  _ Granger  _ her last name was left unsaid. There was already a Hermione Granger, she was growing up with her perfect muggle parents, being spoiled and treated like the perfect miracle she was. With no idea what her future held.

“Jean- My name is Hermione Jean. That's all you need to know.” 

He nodded.

“How old are you Miss Jean?”

“Nineteen.”  _ Or twenty or one- heavens I don’t even remember anymore. _

He didn’t even try to hide his shock, “You look older I will admit.”

She laughed without any humour, “Losing a war will do that to you. Plus i’m sure the scars add a year or two.” she gestured to her face, smiling as calmly as she could. This was the most she had spoken in over a year. 

She had forgotten how much she missed it.

“I assume you are from the future.”

“Five points to Gryffindor.”

“And we lose to Voldemort?” She tried to hide the flinch that ran through her body at the name.

_ The tracker doesn’t exist here, he won’t find you  _ she reassured herself but still gripped her wand harder, the wood almost groaning under her grip.

“Yes, we lose to him.”

“How bad?”

“The Order is destroyed, Hogwarts falls and muggles are rounded up and executed on the streets.”

Dumbeldore paled at her words and rose form his chair, pacing the length of her bed she settled further onto it. Pulling her legs under her she got as comfortable as possible in a paper thin hospital gown.

“How? How could we lose that badly? When?” he sounded for the first time in Hermione's memory, genuinely scared.

“When Harry Potter is in his seventh year at school. That's when the world burns.”

“Harry? He’s just a baby.”

“Yes and he died before he was an adult. Because men like you thought he was some hero saviour who would destroy a man created by those before us.” She spat out the words, venom lacing each word as she watched the old wizards every move, “You make a boy of eleven face Lord Voldemort, you raise him up, you make him think he can win but he is nothing but a lamb waiting for the slaughter.” 

Dumbledore went to say something but she cut him off,”What is today's date?”

“August 29th 1981.”

“In two months Lily and James Potter will be dead. Harry Potter will survive and he will go and live with his aunt,” Harrys story fell from her lips at a rapid pace, she barely stopped as she told the Headmaster how the young wizard battled trolls, werewolves, competed in the triwizard tournament, and faced Voldemort six times before falling at the Battle of Hogwarts.

The window beside her bed showed the sun setting, spectacular pinks and golds rippled across the sky as both Dumbeldore sat back down in the chair, a man defeated.

“We lose.”

“We lose and the world pays for it.”

Dumbeldore was silent for a moment.

“Do you have a plan?”

The question stumped Hermione and she felt a laugh bubble up from inside, “Do I look like I have a plan?”

“You travelled years into the past without a plan?”

“It was this or go back to being tortured by Deatheater for another year or so before I ended up dead.”

“Another year?” 

“Over four hundred days at the mercy of madmen and women. Why did the scars not give it away.”

Hermione's energy was waning and she grew tired on the pity in Dumbledore's eyes.

“Do you have my pink bag?” The headmaster handed it to her and she wasted no time rummaging through it.

Her fingers ghosted over the clothes she had still in there for Harry and Ron, her heart never being able to part with them. She felt for the book given to her by Draco.

As she pulled it out she couldn’t help but smile at what he had written his list in.

_ Good Witches House Spells,  _ she laughed out loud,  _ You arse _

She opened it carefully and saw the familiar handwriting of her classmates. He hadn’t been lying. In even rows of three was every deatheaters name, the green ink bright over the printed pages.

“This is every Deatheater not under the imperius curse, written by a Deatheater who knows. He risked everything for this information.” she handed it over and watched as Dumbeldore took in the names. While some had leapt out at her most were unknown. But for Dumbledore who had probably seen every witch and wizard grow up at Hogwarts she knew this would be a heavy truth.

“I personally know a lot of the events that lead up to the Potters death, not all though so I apologise if i can’t save everyone.”

“Can you save the Potters?” The guilt that laced Dumbledore’s words could have almost been heartbreaking if Hermione have any sympathy for the wizard.

But that had gone years before.

“Why do you think I’m here?”

\-----------

Dumbledore left her alone after a few more probing questions that she was less than excited to tell him the answers too.

“How are you going to save them?”

That question hung in the air long after he was gone. She laid back on the bed and waited for Madame Promfrey to come and give her a night time potion.

The medi-witch announced herself before hermione could even see her and the panic that she didn't realise was in her chest dispersed. 

She looked very much the same as in her time. A few wrinkles less here or there but it was the same smiling face that greeted Hermione.

“Hello sweetie.”

Hermione smiled back, and pulled her hand out in greeting.

“I’m Hermione.”

“I know dear, Albus filled me in. You have had a rough time of it.” The medi-witch took her hand and shook it.

“I have good news and bad news.” she sat down on the side of the bed, her hand still in Hermiones, “I healed most of the scars, over time they will fade. A few pink lines here and there. Some- your face and arm,” Hermione reluctantly touched the scarred  _ mudblood _ , “They won’t go away. I’m very sorry dear. And your nerves, the curses you must have been under, they caused damage I can’t fix. Magic does many thing-” the mediwitch shook as she tried to find the words but Hermione held her hand tightly.

“I know the after effects of the  Cruciatus  curse, it’s okay. It could have been a lot worse.”

Madame Pomfrey nodded as big fat tears welled in her eyes.

“Madame Pomfrey, can I please have my potions now.” 

The medi-witch left her alone after that, heading hopefully to her own bed.

Hermione fell back into the pillows and let out a huge breathe she didn’t even know she was holding.

Her body was broken, she knew that. Not just scarred by werewolves and phycotic witches, she was aware that her nerves were shot. Her hand twitched and her whole left side felt like needles were being shoved in every second she was awake. But it didn’t matter.

She had two months.

Two months to save the world. 

Then she could give up.

She racked her brain on how to do just that though. How could she save the Potters?

_ You need to take Lily’s place on Halloween. You need to be the only one between Voldemort and Harry. _

The plan formed almost instantly, she would have to put into the Potter's house, added security against the Deatheaters, throughout the next two Months Dumbeldore, Maybe Moody and herself would collect all the Horcruxes and then on Halloween Dumbledore will destroy the Horcruxes at the same time Hermione is killing Voldemort. It would be easier in this time then it had been in the future. He wasn’t a serpent creature reborn from the cauldron, he was just a man missing quite a few parts of his soul.

She smiled to herself and swallowed the sleeping potion. 

She closed her eyes and let sleep roll over her.

\-------------------------------

She woke to Dumbledore at her bedside again, at least this time he had brought food.

She told him her plan as she forced down plain toast and a cup of tea.

Both tasted like the richest food she had ever tasted after almost two years of almost starvation.

Dumbeldore had agreed with everything she had said, though he had been rendered speechless for a minute or two at the thought oh Horcruxes but he recovered well.

“Will your plan work?”

“Has to work better than yours, Peter Pettigrew will need to grant me access to the Potter's house, then his memory must be wiped. Voldemort can’t know I exist.”

“Why would Peters memory need to be wiped? He is loyal.”

_ Of course, Peter is loyal still  _ Hermione felt bile rise in her stomach and she regretted the extra slice of toast.

“Peter Pettigrew is a Deatheater, I don't know when he was turned but he is the reason Lily and James died. He betrayed them.”

A curse fell from Dumbledore's lips as he kicked the bedside table in an uncharacteristic show of anger.

“He is their friend, I don't-”

“Remus and Sirius are their friend, they are loyal to the end. Sirius Black goes to Azkaban for trying to kill Peter, the world thinks he killed James and Lily too. He is there for 13 years before he escapes. Remus’s life is ruined when his friends die or get arrested and spends 13 years homeless and alone. Peter Pettigrew ruined their lives.”

Dumbeldore went silent and Hermione took the moment to truly look at the old wizard. He looked exactly how she remembered, bright colour robes with a little bow in his beard she could have been eleven years old again looking up at him with awe in her eyes. But that time was gone and she could see how human he actually looked.

“Do we have a deal?”

“Let me have a day or two to work it out but yes Miss Jean. We have a deal.”

Dumbledore left he with little ceremony and Hermione fell back to sleep, exhaustion making her whole body heavy.

\-----------------

She slept the two days away. Getting up for food and to use the bathroom.

Hermione could have slept for days more, her body finally realising how safe she was. The night before had been the first time she hadn’t woken in the middle of the night to every sound. A whole nine hours of uninterrupted sleep, she had forgotten that luxury.

She had awoken by an angry looking owl, snapping at her fingers. It had rudely left a note on her chest before flying off.

_ Hermione, _

_ Please come to my office when awake. _

_ It’s time we look into your plan. _

_ -A.D _

_ P.S the owl is tempermental. _

Hermione looked over her now bleeding hand and cursed the owl under her breathe.

It took her no time to get dressed, Madam Pomfrey had left her standard black robes with jeans and a shirt with tight sleeves. The medi-witch had thought of clothes that would hide most of her scars, which Hermione could not be more grateful for.

Her long hair she tried to pull back but it had long been a rats nest since her imprisonment. She pulled at it for a moment before remembering a stupid beauty spell Lavender Brown had shown her back in third year.

_ Incutis  _ she muttered and felt her head get instantly lighter, their long tressels she had once loved fell to the floor and she ran her hand through the short fuzz. She had been picturing her mums hair when she cast the spell. Her mum had always been proud of her short fuzz hair style, telling a young Hermione that it wasn’t looks that made a woman but her actions. She had never understood it but she remembered the first time she had worn it out naturally for her first year at Hogwarts, no braids, just her natural afro hair. She had loved it. 

Now she would learn to love the short look, for her mum.

The walk to Dumbledore's office was uneventful, her strength was coming back quickly thanks to the potions she was drinking so she made good time. The doorway wasn’t sealed so she went straight up and opened the door without knocking.

It was obvious she had startled the two men waiting inside.

They were close in height but the tallest was all dark tones, long black hair tied back with black leather, with black jeans and a black shirt. The dark tones contrasted perfectly with the bright smile he put on at the sight of her.

His very presence stopped her in her tracks, she had known she would see him. Had known being in his presence would be part of her mission, but there was a difference between knowing and having Sirius Black standing in front of her smiling like a bloody idiot.

She tore her eyes from him and took in his companion, she had expected to look into the friendly eyes of Remus Lupin. After all there had barely been a time when the two were not attached at the hip. But as she took in the small unassuming eyes of Sirius' companion her stomach fell to the floor and her ears roared with the sound of her blood boiling.

Peter Pettigrew.

Her wand was out and at his throat before she could stop even herself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LONG TALKING BITS---- This chapter had to happen to get to the good bits, so i'm sorry if its not great.  
> Fun Fact: I have written out the chapter titles for this story so I remember where the story needs to go.  
> Chapter one was: Hermione needs a nap and Draco just wants to hang with boys  
> Chapter two was: Meeting Dumbledore- telling him where the stick it.


	3. Chapter Three

She couldn’t drag her eyes from Pettigrew.

He looked so- normal.

_ He looks like their friend  _ a voice that sounded so much like Harry called from inside her, his voice was like a fist to her gut and she pushed her wand further into the throat of Peter Pettigrew, who was still smiling at her.

It was a nice smile, straight teeth and pink gums, he looked harmless.

“Ok- enough of this.” She turned to stare at the intruding voice and made eye contact with the always smiling eyes of Sirius Black. Grey meeting hazel she couldn’t help but almost smile.

“Wand at me, smile at you Padfoot. Nice to know hogwarts girls will always be the same.” Peter quipped, his voice so different to the squeak that had echoed in Hermione's nightmares for months after her third year.

This was the man before the monster, and for the first time it clicked why he was a member of the Marauders, why he was picked to be Sirius’s replacement. He wasn’t some sneaky rat obviously waiting to betray his friends. He was their friend.

“Why did you-” The question almost escaped her lips,  _ Why did you do it  _ she wanted to ask but then shut up quickly remembering she was not meant to know anything. 

Her plan wouldn’t work if this man didn’t betray his friends.

“Why did you call him Padfoot?” She lowered her wand, though it did not return to her pocket. Instead she help a firm hold on it. She wouldn’t be letting her guard down in this room.

Peter smiled and Hermione felt the punch in her gut again as she noticed his dimples.

“It's just a nickname.”

She pushed past them both and rested against Dumbeldores desk, the old man was not in the room and she had long lost the respect she had for the man and his station. 

She could imagine Ron behind Sirius’s shoulder, smiling proudly at her small act of defiance.

“Weird nickname. What’s yours?”

“Wormtail.” he said his nickname with so much mirth in his voice. He knew how stupid of a name it was and was baiting Hermione to comment with a raised brow.

“Cute.” she cut the conversation there, shifting her focus from the traitor to the future ex-con.

Sirius Black was just how people use to describe him, his face was a mix of perfect Aristocratic beauty and rebellious bad boy. His left dark eyebrow was adorned with a small silver ring that Hermione wishes she could report back to Ginny, who would have found the whole thing  _ amazing. _

His black on black attire almost matched her own but while hers was practical his was definitely a fashion statement, the jeans were a black so dark they had to have been magiced darker, and paired with a Zeppelin shirt he was the post boy of rebelling Pureblood.

“I take it you two are Sirius Black and  Peter Pettigrew.” she pointed to each as she said their name, enjoying their nods as she ‘guessed’ correctly.

“And now Miss you have us at a disadvantage as we do not know your name.”

“Hermione Jean. I’m sure it's a pleasure.”

Hermione couldn’t believe the almost flirting tone that she was using,  _ This is Harry's GODFATHER!  _ The fifteen year old in her yelled but the almost twenty years old was enjoying the way he was staring at her. It was almost like a challenge she wanted to win.

“Do you know why we are here, Kitten?” The nickname startled her. The familiarity in his voice was so much like  _ her  _ Sirius Black she could almost picture him in his father's old clothes, hanging around the old Black Manor kitchen, stealing bread off Mrs Weasleyes toasting rack.

“Don’t give me a nickname.” she said through gritted teeth.

Any response he had was cut off by the entrance of Albus Dumbeldore, the older professor wandered in as if this was any other meeting, he smiled at the boys and motioned for them to sit. How he was stomaching have Peter Pettigrew in his office was unknown to Hermione. Every second in his presence was making her more and more queasy.

“Hello everyone.” He sat on his desk and folded his hands together in front.

“I am sure you have all gotten well acquainted.”

Sirius smirked and leaned further back in his chair, “Hermione was just about to tell us more about herself.”

She scoffed and moved from the desk, walking towards the Pensieve that Harry would later try to destroy in a fit of rage. She ran her fingers over the rim and looked in.

_ You bastard _

She turned back, and stared down the headmaster.

“Can we skip the small talk and get down to why we are here.”

Sirius snorted a laugh and Peter smacked him on the shoulder, “Grow up Pads.”

Dumbeldore smiled at the two, “Hermione here is with the Order of the Phoenix.”

_ Liar _

“She has been undercover for the past year or so and has proven herself to be a great asset in the fight against Voldemort.”

Hermione held the flinch as Dumbeldore said that bloody name. She tried to ignore all the eyes on her and looked instead at Fawkes who was snoozing on his perch.

“Her?” Peter said pointing rather rudely.

“Yes Mr Pettigrew, Miss Jean has proven herself to me. Now why we are here is very simple. All of us in this room wish to make sure James and Lily make it out of this war.”

_ Not all of us  _ she thought bitterly unable to take her eyes off the traitor who was nodding along with Sirius Black. She could almost feel the wood in her wand splintering with the tight grip she was holding it and she took three deep breaths.

“I have decided that the Potters require a little bit of backup and that is where you gentlemen come in. Sirius and Miss Jean will need access to the Potters safehouse and they will remain there as extra security for James and Lily. You will both be required for other missions during this time but I will give you plenty of time to prepare.”

Hermione nodded along, Dumbeldore was lying in a roundabout way. James and Lily didn’t really need extra security, the wards on their house would be impenetrable. As long as they were not betrayed by Peter Pettigrew. What they needed was someone to take Lily’s place on Halloween in Harry’s bedroom. 

That would be her job. And Lily wouldn’t allow just anyone to babysit her child when he’s the most wanted child on the planet.

But why was Sirius going with her?

“Why is Black coming?” 

Sirius sent her a death glare, “Because they are my family.”

“More the reason not to get yourself involved. Conflicting interest and all that.”

Hermione could see the rage to Sirius rise up, she had spent many evenings listening to Sirius and Remus talk about this time period. On the rage Black had felt at being useless during the first war, while James was hiding, Peter was sent on small missions and Remus was undercover with the Werewolf packs, Sirius was kept away from the fighting doing research and errands for the Order. All because he carried the last name Black, and no matter what he did he couldn’t be truly trusted.

It was why no one fought for him when he went to Azkaban. 

She almost felt bad for trying to talk Dumbeldore out of including him. But Sirius was an unnecessary addition to the mission.

“Sirius’ involvement is non-negotiable. He will be an asset in protecting the Potters.” 

“He is hot headed and too close to this matter.”

Dumbeldore raised an eyebrow and stared her down, for a moment she felt eleven years old again, “And you’re not too close, Hermione?”

She clenched her jaw and looked away. 

“Too close?” Peter squeaked.

“All I mean is, we all want the Potters to survive and for little Harry to have the best life possible.”

“Of course.” 

It took a little longer to work out the details but after almost an hour of discussion the plan was in place.

The later that day Peter would apparate Sirius and Hermione to the Potter's house were he would give them entrance, then his memory would be wiped by Hermione. Who had promised them all she was very skilled.

_ You get good at them when you are erasing yourself from your parents life _ she left that unsaid but she felt heavy in the stomach at the thought of performing another memory wipe, even if it was on Peter Pettigrew.

They would then spend their time keeping an eye on the perimeter and protecting the Potters.

Sirius and Peter excused themselves after Peter's stomach rumbled loud enough to wake Fawkes who glares the young man into leaving the room. Sirius went with him mumbling something about needing a good last meal before being subjected to Lilys cooking.

Hermione found herself alone with the Headmaster and she could barely keep her anger in as she threw up a silencing charm. The last thing she needed was for Sirius and Pettigrew to hear her lose her cool.

“I don’t need back up.” she said through clenched teeth.

“I know you do not but Mr Black needs a job to do and this will keep him out of Order business.”

Hermione was taken back by the frankness of Dumbledore's answer.

“Out of order business?”

“He is still a Black, and they are not known to be on the right side of history.”

Hermione was rendered speechless. Albus Dumbeldore had once been or will once be, the man that would fight for Sirius’s freedom, but at this moment he was comparing the young man to his family, to Bellatrix.

Hermione would not have it.

“Sirius Black is one of the greatest men I know, he has and will risk his life time and time again for this bloody war and you compare him to the  _ bitch  _ that did this.” she shoved up her sleeve to show her scar. Anger was pulsing through her veins and she couldn’t help spit more anger at Dumbledore, “If we fail he goes to Azkaban for 13 years and you do NOTHING! Nothing to help him until it's way too late!”

Dumebldore stayed quiet but nodded as he took in her words.

“You stole my memories! You took them while I slept and that is not alright with me. I have kept my mind safe from Deatheaters for years and you took them from me. Why?”

It was what she had seen in the pensieve, her memories from eleven to Draco giving her the time turner, copies of the worst and best moments in her life all laid out for Dumbledore's amusement.

“Would you trust someone that just landed in Hogsmeade, saying they were from the future without any truth?”

“You could have asked.”

“Would you have given me them?” 

“Not all of them.”

“There is your answer, I do apologise that I took them without permission but I needed to know what I now know.”

“And what is that?”

“You are a very good friend to the young Master Potter.”

Hermione fell back into the chair Sirius had vacated and put her head in her hands. She desperating wanted out of this room, away from the ghosts that would now follow her everywhere.

“You now know where all the Horcruxes are?” She had seen those memories clear as day in the magical water, Harry and Ron's faces had looked up at her from the depth. 

“Yes and in the next few weeks, you and Sirius plus a few select members of the Orders will collect them. Then we will destroy them.” 

“On Halloween?”

“Yes on Halloween I will destroy them.”

“And I will destroy him.”

They sat for a few more moments, Hermione answering truthfully the questions Dumbledore needed answering. 

“And the seventh Horcrux?”

“You’ll know what to do when the time comes.”

She made her exit then, grabbing the bag Dumbeldore had packed for her, standard issue clothes and her pink bag. Filled to the brim with everything she would need to destroy Lord Voldemort.

\-----------------------------

She met the others at the entrance way to the Great hall. Hermione tried to not take in too much of the school around her, her heart unable to take the familiarity of it all. She ran a finger over the stone wall and remembered the building she left behind.

_ You can do this  _ Harry whispered to her and she closed her eyes, she still hadn’t cried since her escape. She had wanted to, even more now that she could see the plan ahead but there would be time for crying later.

The 1st of November will be a day of celebration and emotions.

She took one more second to compose herself before walking up to the two men.

She offered them both a weak smile and a nod in greeting.

“Ready to go?”

Sirius smiled at her, all the hostility from the headmaster's office gone as he looked her up and down.

“You just got the one bag?”

“It’s all I need. Where's your gear?”

“Already there, James moved all my stuff in before this whole drama began. I was meant to be a live in nanny for Harry.”

“You two were close then?”

“Best friends.” he smiled broadly again as Peter smacked his shoulder, “One of my best friends.” he corrected before trying to grab her hand.

Hermione jumped back, pulling her whole body away from Sirius. Her heart leapt into her chest and she could feel every hair on her body standing on edge.

“Hermione, I just need your hand to apparate okay?” he held his hand out again this time allowing her to make contact. 

_ Come on Hermione, grow up!  _

She took his hand and the pain she expected to feel never came and she breathed out slowly.

A side effect of continued exposure to the Cruciatus curse was long term nerve damage and for Hermione it felt like something sharp was being stabbed into her when anything came into contact with her bare skin. Even her own clothes gave the feeling so she couldn’t help but be shocked as Sirius’s touch was nothing on her skin than warm skin on skin. She wrapped her fingers around his hand and almost sighed.

“Okay let's go.” she smiled up at the Marauder whose hair was coming loose from his tie. 

Peter went to grab her hand, a similar smile to Sirius’s on his lips and Hermione felt the pain again as he linked their hands together. The searing pain made her see spots as the traitor pulled her closer.

“One the count of three-” he said and Hermione couldn’t stop staring at the hand holding hers, Peters right hand in hers, the hand that would one day be used to resurrect Lord Voldemort. To bring about the Second wizarding war.

Before she could rip her hand from his, she felt the familiar pull of Apparition and she lost contact with the ground below her.

\--------

Godric's Hollow had been quiet the last time she had been there, Christmas evening when all the muggles had been in their beds.

It was just as she remembered, thatched roof houses lining the cobbled street with bright flowers in every garden bed.

It looked so - peaceful Hermione stumbled as she stepped away from the two men. Shaking her hand to remove the feeling of Peters touch she gathered herself for the next step of her plan.

James and Lily Potter.

Peter moved with the confidence of a man who knew where he was going while Sirius walked behind him, throwing a smile over his shoulder to get Hermione to follow.

This Sirius seemed always quick to smile, a trait he had obviously lost in the future.

She pulled her bag higher on her shoulder and followed behind them, unable to stop her head swiveling around taking in the perfectly ordinary day. She was unable to hide the smile on her face as she saw a family of four walking down the path, mum carrying a baby on her hip while a little boy dragged the father along.

Hermione couldn’t remember the last time she had seen that. 

Peter stopped in front of an empty lot, he turned and held his hand out again for Sirius, who took it with ease. Hermione grabbed his offered hand once again leaning into the pain free touch. She wanted to voice her thoughts, to wonder out loud why his touch did not hurt her but as soon as her hand was in his the empty lot before her changed.

Where overgrown grass had been was a perfectly manicured yard with more than ten hedge creatures lining the barrier. Magic secateurs working on their own making stags, wolves and cats out of the hedge. The house was like all the others on the street, tudor inspired with a thatched roof and a big open front door where a couple stood waving. Sirius ripped his hand from hers and Peters and rushed forward. He practically leapt into the mans arms and they spun around laughing at something no one else was privy to.

Sirius found himself back on the ground and pulled the couple into his arms again, kissing both their cheeks.

“Merlin Padfoot it hasn’t been that long!” The man spluttered as he wiped the kiss from his cheek, but his smile didn’t falter as he brought Sirius in for another hug.

Hermione felt her heart in her throat again as he turned to look at her.

_ Harry  _ she thought, and for a second she prayed it was him until she saw the eyes, and she finally understood why everyone said Harry was like his father. They could have been a mirror image. 

If Harry had lived that long.

James Potter walked towards her quickly hand outstretched, “You must be Hermione, we got an owl to expect you. Thank you.”

He smiled as Hermione gently shook his hand, she barely noticed the pain as her heart broke once again as a hand slip around James waist and she came eye to eye with the bright green gaze of Lily Potter.

“It’s an honour.” she croaked out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was called in my drafts: Chapter Three- Hermione really hates Albus and Peter Pettigrew is the worst.
> 
> \-----  
> Please enjoy, comment, review, yell me, what ever you want :)


	4. Chapter Four

There was a silence like no other as four friends took in the stranger on their doorstep.

Hermione was not naive enough to think that they would accept her with open arms, she knew what she looked like.

Even if she ignored the almost shaven head and the bags under her eyes that made her look like the living dead, it was her scars she could feel them staring at. The three long jagged marks across her face itched as she saw Lily's  _ Harry’s _ eyes scan over them, she subconsciously tried to hide them by turning away from the parents of her best friend. But as she turned from James and Lily's watchful eyes she came face to face with Peter Pettigrew again who smile broadly.

“I think that one looks pretty cool.” he said gesturing to the small scar that cut through her brow, his voice like a knife down her back, a pain she was well aware of after her year at Malfoy Manor.

Sirius slapped Peter over the head and hissed at him to apologise as Hermione stared daggers at the man. She wanted to scream at him, to curse his existence but no words could form in her head or tongue as she stood in the presence of the very people that would change the outcome of this war.

“Come inside.” Lily said dragging Sirius by one arm into the house, whispering something under her breath while he nodded along.

“Pete- you coming in or do you have to go?” James pulled his friend into another hug while Hermione stood to the side still unable to say anything at all.

Harry and Ron would have lost it at her rendered speechless, they would have made so many jokes at her expense that would have brought a smile to her lips.

_ Hermione granger- speechless- well I guess pigs do fly _

_ Mione- I thought Percy would get a girlfriend before you have nothing to say! _

She could hear them now, mocking her in the way they use to do. The way they had up until the day they died.

“Nah sorry Prongs, Dumbeldore wants me back at the school to go over some stuff.” Hermione could taste the lie in the air but James just smiled broadly.

“But you’ll come around soon, right? Lily is planning on trying to make a full Christmas feast this year so you might need to come and try it.”

“And then buy the Chinese on the way?’

“Of course!” the two laughed at the inside joke, forgetting Hermione was even present.

“I’ll walk you out.” Hermione said, her voice barely a whisper. 

The two walked the brief distance to the edge of the Potters property. Peter still smiling but Hermione drew her wand and held it to his head. The memory charm on the tip of her tongue.

“I am going to erase all of today from your memory, You won’t remember me at all and you will think Sirius Black is off on a secret mission.”

She smiled at the Deatheater and grabbed his forearm, pressing down hard, from the look of pure fear on his face she knew she had hit her target. She slid the sleeve up and took in the dark mark. The tattoo was so fresh she could see the broken blood vessels under the colour. She pressed her short nails into the skin, enjoying the sound that escaped Pettigrew's lips.

“I have something similar to this,” and with a moment of removing her wand from his head, she lifted her own sleeve and forced him to stare at her scar,  _ mudblood _ .

“Mines better, at least I own it.” she hissed through clenched teeth.

“One day soon I am going to destroy you, I will destroy everything thing you love and hold dear, but since you are about to betray the only people on this planet that care for you, that may only be yourself.” She couldn’t help but smile as the fear grew in Peters' eyes.

“I will rip you limb from limb till you are begging for death but I won’t let you die, I will hand you over to the dementors with a lovely anti-animagus spell. You will be alone, with no friends for the rest of your days.”

The spell sparked from the end of her wand and she saw the fear slipped away as Peter quickly forgot the last 6 hours or so. He blinked and crooked his head as Hermione pushed him over the boundary. He disappeared from sight as the wards settled around him.

Hermione added her own wards to the collection, watching as her magic merged with the signatures of Albus Dumbeldore and Lily Evans, whose signature was so unique that though she had never seen it before it could only be Lily’s.

\-------------

She walked back to James who had turned his head to give her privacy to mind wipe his friend.

“I wish you didn’t have to do that.” he said, sounding so much like Harry it was a punch to the throat.

“I had to, if You-Know-Who gets a hold of him he’s a liability.”

“God I hate this war.”

“Ditto.”

James looked between Hermione and the door, shuffling his feet in a way that mirrored his son. When Harry had something he wanted to say but didn’t know how to ask he too would look anywhere but at her, shifting his weight from leg to leg and swinging his arms around like he had just discovered he had them.

“What do you want to ask James?” 

He looked at her, brow raised, “How did you-”

“I know when someone doesn’t want to ask something, I’m not a complete idiot.” she smiled at him and he awkwardly smiled back.

_ Wow he looks like me  _ Harry said in the back of his mind  _ It's like a mirror _

_ More like the Mirror of Erised  _ Hermione replied before pushing any more thoughts of her best friend away.

“I need to see your arm.” He gestured to her forearm.

“Its smart, checking strangers arms. Do you check your friends?” The retort was out before she could slam it back down. James visibly flinched at the accusation.

“I trust them.”

“That's good. Though there could always be a-” she struggled to find another word for Rat, Peter Pettigrew had to betray his friends, she knew that at the bottom of her stomach but after seeing three-quarters of the Marauders that fact didn’t hurt any less - “mole.”

“Not with my friends.”

“I remember having that much confidence in mine as well.”

“Did anyone betray you?”

“No, they would’ve died before they did that.” Sirius words from her third year echoed around her,  _ I would rather die than betray my friends. _

“Where are they now?”

“Dead.” The single word ended any further conversation as Hermione pushed up both sleeves, on one arm the familiar scrawl of Mudblood entwined with small raised pink flesh, the other just as scarred with crisscrosses of cursed magic. She left them uncovered and met James' eyes. He looked from the scars on her arm to the scars on her face.

His mouth opening to say something before he simply shook his head and smiled broadly.

“Come inside, Lily made scones and if you cover them in enough cream they are almost edible.”

\-------

The Potter's house was as adorable inside as outside, the couple had turned their self made prison into an interior designers nightmare. Softly patterned wallpaper covered every wall, each room a slightly different shade and pattern. The flooring carpeted in the thickest and softest material that Hermione's shoes almost disappeared.

“Lily loves textures, so everything has to feel lovely. Even if it clashes with everything else.” James said as he guided her from the hallway into the open plan kitchen and dining room. They passed a lounge room where quidditch trophies and family portraits battled for front placement on the mantelpiece and there was an overstuffed bright orange couch, covered in a patchwork quilt and crocheted pillows.

The kitchen where Sirius was already sprawled out with a mouth full of scones, was a witches dream. A large black AGA stove was the main focus, with little cauldrons floating above and a kettle whistling below it brought a smile to the time traveler. Lily was mixing something in one of the cast iron cauldrons while bouncing her baby on her hip. 

Hermione was so focused on the interior that she didn’t realise that her future best friend was right there in front of her.

Lily smiled broadly when she noticed her husband was in the room, her eyes shining just because he was there.

“Come in! Come in! Please.” she gestured for Hermione to stop loitering in the doorway.

“Did you want a cup of tea? Coffee?”

Hermione just nodded, rendered speechless once again as baby Harry turned his little head and stared up at her. With a full head of hair and his bright green eyes, he was simply-

“Perfect.” she whispered.

Lily looked down at her little boy and smiled even wider, “I know isn’t he, though none of us will be saying that at two am tomorrow when he is screaming bloody murder.” she lifted her son up and held him nose to nose, “Will we? No, we won’t!” in a baby voice.

“Do you guys know how this works?” Sirius asked, spitting scone crumbs all over Lily’s table.

“Swallow for god's sake Sirius, you’re worse than Harry! But no we don’t.” James said slapping his friend before taking a seat beside his mate. Lily took the one opposite her husband leaving Hermione the one right in front of Sirius. She sat down trying to take up as little space as possible as Sirius’s legs seemed to take up both his side and her side of the table. He smiled and winked as their legs bumped together.

“Black and I will take turns at night watching the property, keeping the wards as up to date as possible, adding more magic to them as often as we feel they need it. We are here as a last resort. If the deatheaters get in, merlin forbid, it will be us that fight them off while you will go to the second location. And under no circumstances will you tell us where that is.”

Sirius nodded along having already gone over this with Dumbeldore hours before but Lily and James had questions. As all good parents would, when raising the future saviour of the wizarding world.

“Has there been new information?”

“Why now?”

“How can we ask you to do this?”

The last question was almost whispered by Lily who couldn’t look at either of them, instead was staring unseeingly at Harry’s head.

“There has been no new information, this is just an extra bit of protection. The Longbottoms have the same protection-” the little white lie slipped out but she knew that the very kind Potters would not take the extra protection if the other parents in the same position didn’t, “And you can ask us to do this because nothing else matters but Harry. He must stay alive.”

“Because he’s the baby that will destroy you-know-who?” James spat bitterly while Sirius placed a comforting hand on his back.

“Because he's a baby who doesn’t deserve to be killed by a madman. Who is going to grow up to be whatever he wishes to be.”

“Quidditch star.”Sirius added smiling at his best friend.

They sat in silence while Hermione still stared at her best friend who was currently trying to put the end of his mothers braid in his mouth.

“Did you want to hold him?” Lily asked holding the wiggling baby out for Hermione to hold.

_ NO!  _ She screams internally, there was one thing to be in the same room as a baby version of her friend but to hold him, it was just too much. She shook her head and stood up quickly, her chair almost falling over.

“I’m really bad with babies.” she said hoping that would cover her for her weird behavior,  _ Get it together Hermione, it's just Harry in a nappy. It’s not like he's naked!  _ Hermione could almost hear Ron’s smirk as his voice took over.

“Where can I put my things?” She asked to change the question.

The looks James and Lily shared was terrifying as they smirked at their guests.

“We only have one spare room- how do you guys feel about sharing?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another Chapter down- the working title of this chapter was Hermione fights a rat and Lily and James are just perfect!  
> I hope you enjoy this chapter, I very much loved writing this one and I live for Lily Potter being an absolute housewife disaster with no taste and also not being able to cook. Potions master she might be it doesn't mean she is able to bake scones.


	5. Chapter Five

Chapter Five:

Hermione still couldn’t believe how her day had ended up. If anyone had said that by sunset she would be standing in a bright pink, floral wallpapered room staring at two twin beds and the world's ugliest duvet covers she would have laughed.

If she could remember how to do that.

But the reality of her life hit like a ton of bricks as Sirius Black flopped himself onto one of the beds, stretching out till his feet hung over the edge and his head was just a hair breathe from the wall.

“Well Kitten, this is going to be very cosey.”

“I don’t like nicknames.”

Sirius’ only response was a raised eyebrow and a smirk that Hermione really wanted to slap off him. “Don’t be so dramatic, a nickname between friends is a good thing.” 

“We’re not friends.” she was short with him but the look he was giving her was enough to make her knees almost buckle.

This boy in front of her, because that was all he was a boy, was so far from the man she had known growing up. Instead of haunted grey eyes, she saw only laughter, the creases she thought had come from years in prison were already present but as he smiled at her from his bed, it was obvious they had once been laughter lines. He was so far from the man she knew she could almost forget.

Almost.

 

She started to unpack her small bag into the shelves by the other spare bed. Madame Pomfrey had packed her the basics, three robes, three jeans and a selection of shirts in various shades from black to grey to a particularly bright shade of pink that went right to the bottom on the shelf. 

Sirius watched her every move, his grey eyes following her as she bent down to place her spare runners at the foot of the bed before moving to their shared bathroom.

“So we are going to be living together, so soon as well. What would your friends say?” His tone was light, jovial as he settled further into the pillows but his eyes held no warmth as he awaited her answer.

She knew what he was doing, trying to flirt his way into getting answers into who she was. But he as a boy fresh out of Hogwarts and she had been around the block way to many times to fall for something so flattering.

She gave him an exhausted look which only made his smile wider.

_ Oh they would not be pleased  _ Ron snarked, Hermione could feel the frustration Ron would have over her current living situation.

_ Amused- who will make it out alive, Padfoot or Mione?  _ Harry quipped and it was a heavy blanket on Ronalds jealousy and she just smiled slightly.

“They would be wondering what I did to be stuck with you.” She closed the bathroom door quietly and found herself in a tiled room of silence.

The bathroom tiles were cool as she slid her tired body onto them. 

_ I can’t do this  _ She spoke directly to the voices in her head, letting them have unhindered access.

_ Of course you can do this Hermione _

_ Harry’s right unless you kill Sirius first- can you last till halloween? _

_ Ignore Ron, Hermione. You have this. _

Harry’s calm voice was just what she needed to hear. For the first time in almost a year she felt tears swell as she pulled her knees under her chin.

_ I miss you so much  _ she said and could almost feel her friends holding her tight.

_ I am officially losing my mind  _

She sat on the tiles as she finally let the tears fall, she wasn’t sobbing, she had no energy left for such an action but the tears didn’t need much to fall freely. She just sat on the cold floor, with her eyes shut she could have been anywhere, back at Hogwarts, back in her childhood bedroom, or back in Malfoys Mannor awaiting another round of torture.

That train of thought brought her back to the present, she couldn’t bring herself to remember those months. The pain and the torture could be dealt with another day, but for day-

Today she had to deal with the very attractive grey eyed marauder in her bedroom and the baby down the hall that would one day grow to be her Best friend.

_ But I won’t be your best friend Hermione- when i’m eleven you’re gonna be old  _ Harry chimed in, a smile in his voice.

_ Maybe I can keep you in line more as Aunty Hermione _

Harry’s laugh gave her enough courage to wipe away the tears, and straighten her clothing.

The robes she wore rode up slightly on her arm and she looked down at the tiny nail scars and the ‘od’ of Mudblood showed.

She could hide the scars, a handful of glamour spells could hide it all but as she looked at herself in the mirror she smiled. The scars, her arms, her chest with the dark curse Dolohov gave her the peaked out just slightly at the neckline of her shirt, the slash marks down her cheek. 

The scars made her who she was and if Sirius Black had anything to say about he could answer to her wand.

\---------------------------

Sirius wasn’t there when she exited the bathroom, his clothes already spread all over his half of the room. It almost reminded her of sharing a tent with Harry and Ron. 

She wandered around the halls, running her finger her fingers gently over the wall furnishings, taking in the mixture of muggle and magical photographs.

She lingered on a photo of a very young James Potter, he was smiling in front of the Hogwarts express with who could have only been his mother.

Harry truly did look like his dad right from the start because changing the square glasses for round ones, it was just like it was a photo of her friend.

A creak in the floorboards dragged her from her mind and she pulled her wand on instinct holding it at throat point.

“Well at least you’re quick with it. But can you use it?”

Lily Evans was a formidable woman when her child wasn’t strapped to her hip. All the softness that Hermione had seen in the kitchen was gone and in its place was an exhausted mother with fear in her very being.

Hermione lowered her wand but kept it in hand. 

“I can. I promise.” she moved away from the photos and headed further down the corridor.

She could feel Lil’s eyes watching her and she turned back.

“I promise you Lily, I am going to look after your son.”

Lily cocked her head and raised a brow.

“Why?”

“Because I am the only one who can.”

“You think big of yourself.”

Hermione thought over her next words, trying to think of how to express her absolute love for the baby she had just met. when the reality hit her straight in the chest.

“I have nothing else to lose.”

Lily’s eyes showed all the emotion Hermione could handle for the day and she had to turna way again.

_ Well done ‘Mione you made my Mum sad  _  Harry quipped at her but just the joy in his voice at saying mum made the moment just slightly better.

Lily walked up behind her and slipped her hand into Hermiones’ wandless one, and gave it a squeeze.

“Thank you.” she whispered before letting go and disappeared into one of the bedrooms.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

 

It took Hermione a moment to gather herself again, but she soon found herself on the back porch looking out at the large green yard she had only noticed. A hedge ran around the border with a small stone path winding its way along.

She stopped against the railing and breathed in the fresh air, the crisp clear air was luxury to her still beaten lungs and with each breath she felt a little better.

Harry was with her now, she could feel it as if he stood right next to her. SHe could almost hear his laughter and a ghost of his breathe was against her face as if he was kissing her cheek gently. Like he had done countless times when her panic had risen up during their adventures. 

Ron was, or had been, the love of her life but Harry… Harry was her brother in always that counted. 

“Penny for your thoughts?”

And just like that, it was as if Harry had returned just for her. James stepped out of the shadows further and the illusion was broken. She smiled back at him, forced and unsure she knew her face would betray her but James, ever the gentlemen like his son, did not back away.

“Just enjoying being outside.”

“I know the feeling, though I am starting to hate my own garden. Feeling claustrophobic.”

She looked out at the vast space before her, the garden was larger than her childhood home.

“How could you be with so much space?”

“It gets smaller the longer you stay, I promise you.”

“It’s not a four by four cell at least.” she said before she could stop herself. She quickly tried to walk away but James grabbed her upper arm. Not tightly but firmly and she almost fell into the touch once again the normally splitting pain of her nerves evaporated with a kind touch and she turned back to him unable to look him in the eye.

“Hermione? Where were you before Dumbeldore sent you to us?”

She couldn’t lie, not when the face of her Best Friend was looking at her so earnestly. 

“I was held prisoner by some deatheaters for a while.”

_ And now you made Dad sad  _ Harry whispered and she couldn’t bring herself to look James in the eye.

“I’m sorry about that Hermione. And I am truly sorry Dumbeldore has made you enter another type of prisoner.” his words were genuine and a smile erupted on her face and she couldn’t help but meet his eye.

“I can forgive him for you and Lily but I might never forgive him for Black.”

James laugh was a wonderful melody.

“I will never forgive him for Sirius either. He did the rooming lists for our first year.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it has been awhile but chapter five is up!   
> And we have Hermione interacting with everyone in the house besides little baby Harry.

**Author's Note:**

> This is been in my head for the last 10 years- it has been rewritten, reworked and has two sequels and prequals all stuck in there so I thought it was about time I shared it. Because this Is all in my head I don't know when the updates will be but bare with me.  
> Let me know your thoughts, critics, or whatever.


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